Monday, November 29, 2010

30 days of truth (Day 9)

Day 09 → Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.

I had a few friends in college that I drifted from when we all moved. We've kept in loose contact, but I've been pretty bad about making the day trip over to see people. I'm trying to be better about that. They're great people and I don't want to lose them as friends.

And what do ya know, one of them just emailed me. Told ya - good people.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

30 days of truth (Day 8)

Day 08 → Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.

Hmm, I think I should re-work this list. Some of these are sorta all about bitching. And I really don't think I have an instance of someone who made my life hell... I either get lost or get even, but either way, I don't just let it happen. I'm sure that if I let other people make suggestions for this post that I could get a few submissions. But really - I feel that you only LET people make your life hell, and there's always ways to get out from under that. So its hard for me to place blame on other people. I suppose I could go into people who I hated working with at work, but I tend to move on ASAP if I get into those situations.

Sorry. Crap post. Whomp-wah.

Monday, November 22, 2010

30 days of truth (Day 7)

Day 07 → Someone who has made your life worth living for.

Trying to whittle this down to one person might be tough... I'll just say that my mother and two older brothers have done a lot for me, both directly and indirectly.

Obviously, they've all given me a lot of direct support all my life... advice, phone calls, positive vibes, etc. But indirectly, they've made my life literally worth living for by just being themselves. There have been times in the past few years where I was so down that they were literally the only reason I could find to keep on going at all.

On a much less dramatic but no less truthful note: I sometimes also think that its worth living just to observe the unpredictable and wondrous event that is life on this planet. Crazy good or bad weather, the insane coincidences, the vastness of the universe, the newest gadget realized from a childhood sci-fi movie, the unpredictability of people... There's something existentially and fundamentally amazing about the fact that those phenomenon aren't unique to our lifetimes. People have been reveling in these things for centuries... Little feelings of amazement, awe, and understanding that appear in a flash and then gone even faster. Those moments are - in part - I think why we're all HERE.

Friday, November 19, 2010

30 days of truth (Day 6)

Day 06 → Something you hope you never have to do.

Man, um... I can think of lots of things I hope to never have to do.

  • Watch one of my children die before I do
  • Kill someone
  • Wonder how I'll get my next meal
  • Meet a certain someone's future kids
  • Fight a panda
This is a depressing one and its Friday so I'm calling this one short.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Medal of Honor

The Medal of Honor is a big deal. You hear about it all the time, but its actually a bit of a controversy. It hasn't been given out much in the past few scenes of war, due to the drop in "in-close" combat and - allegedly - increasing bureaucratic process.

However, today marks the first time a Medal of Honor has been awarded to a living recipient since the Vietnam War. And he's from Iowa.

Staff Sgt. Sal Giunta's actions are nothing short of action-movie caliber. Here's the official account. I'll break it down for you layman's style here:

Bunch of soldiers traveling down a road. A dozen taliban fighters spring an ambush - an "L" shaped ambushed, designed to separate a team off from the squad, and the squad off from the platoon. Its designed to kill everyone in a small area, then run. So there's 12 taliban fighters shooting rockets and machine guns at just his team.... from 20 FEET AWAY. So, imagine that.

Everyone in platoon is hit - even the medic is killed. The point man is Giunta's best friend, Sgt Josh Brennan. He's hit eight times. Eight. Giunta is 4th man back. The guy in front of him is hit 4 times. Giunta takes one round to his flak jacket, and another off his weapon strapped to his back. Its fucking RAINING automatic weapons fire. From 20 ft away, remember.

Giunta sees that his friend, Sgt. Brennan, is being drug away by two talibani fighters to who knows where. Nowhere good. Giunta leaves cover, runs into the effing middle of this, shoots one of the talibani and wounds the other who drops his team leader (and friend) and runs away. Giunta grabs Brennan by the body armor and drags him back to cover and starts administering aid.

Brennan eventually died of his wounds the next day, but Giunta's actions meant that the taliban were denied a possible ransom or execution, and Brennan's parents were able to have a proper burial for their son.

I heard Giunta's interview on NPR coming to work yesterday. He was asked if he was a "good soldier." He responded that he felt that he was "average. I'm mediocre." He didn't sound like the stereotypical heavy brooding soldier type. He sounded like a completely normal person. Thrust into a warzone. While he may not see himself as exceptional - this story is a tiny microcosm of the people serving our country. Normal people being asked to do extra-ordinary things on a daily basis. Shit like this happens so often that its just another day's work to them. Its a great image of how people rise to the occasion to do whatever it is than needs done.

Its a little late for veteran's day - but here's my contribution: Giunta (and others like you) - you should know that you're anything but average.

30 days of truth (Day 5)

Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life.

Hmmm... there's a lot of things I'd like to eventually get done in my life. Maybe I'll just use this post to lay down a quick bucket list.

  1. Backpack around Europe for about 3 weeks. Amsterdam, Prague, Germany, Italy, Greece... however much I can fit in. Best case scenario would be going with about 4 other people. Won't be a cheap trip, but still.
  2. Get good at guitar. I know that most people give me attitude when I say that, but most people just don't get it. I'm not good at guitar. I'm an imitator, and I'm not very good at improvisational solo of any kind. I have no idea what I'm doing outside of chords. I know a few scales, but don't understand how to correctly apply them. I need to just break down and take a few lessons. I know what level I want to be at to be happy, and I'm not there yet.
  3. Find a good girl, get a dog, get married after a few years, have a kid or two a few years after that. All these stupid/ignorant people are breeding like rabbits, and I feel like I have a responsibility to mankind to procreate. Ha. I laughed as I typed that.
  4. Have the means to have a small guitar shop in a garage or something. Even if its just for me, I'd like to be able to build better and better custom guitars.
  5. Play at least one show (large or small) in LA, Seattle, New York, and Chicago.
  6. Grow a decent beard.
  7. Break 175lbs.
  8. Have a Vegas weekend. Not a classy one. A crazy Fear and Loathing-style binge of excess and debauchery. Might be harder to pull that off 40 years later, but I'll find a way.
  9. Sell a piece of my artwork for >$200. I feel like that's a good benchmark of "legitimate artist."
  10. Learn a martial arts form of some kind. Really, I'd even settle for Tai Chi.
whew. 10's enough for now. There's more places I'd like to visit, but then this list will get out of hand.

Monday, November 15, 2010

30 days of truth (Day 4)

Day 04 → Something you have to forgive someone for.

This one is actually quite a bit harder - I don't really operate like this. I tend to blame myself rather than others in most situations. I guess I need to work on forgiving people their traffic transgressions, ha. I laugh, but its an honest statement. Not everything needs to become a 'teachable moment' on the road. Especially when I do stupid crap all the time.

I've mentioned that I relate to this guy before, but here's another comic from The Oatmeal that sums this up pretty well.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

30 days of truth (Day 3)

Day 03 → Something you have to forgive yourself for.

I guess this is where the 30 days get a little heavy, but I said I'd do it...

When I got out of college, I had a really good girlfriend and to make a very long and complicated story short (and to avoid trying to make excuses) - I was petty and short sighted and elected not to move in with her and foolishly thought we had more time before we needed to think about getting married, when in fact I should have been giving her a ring right then. I wasn't ready to proverbially 'settle down.' Anyways, I sucked as a boyfriend and she left and it wasn't for several months until I realized exactly how much I'd fucked up. The kind of fuck up that you don't come back from. Especially knowing how much she enjoyed where she ended up and the amazing friends she'd made. You can't, in good conscience, ask someone to leave that much positivity to take a huge gamble AGAIN. Of course, I was in a pretty bad place this whole time, and DID ask her to take that gamble. I wasn't in good conscience, okay? Really, an argument could be made that the fact that I did ask her to do that showed that I wasn't really worth the gamble. A better person would let her go. That's really easy to say but much harder to do. Not having contact with her makes me feel dead inside, and every day is a brave face, a complete farce - pretending I'm okay with I'm totally not, hoping that eventually I'll fool myself into actually being okay. But I know its the right thing to do.

Anyways, its 100% my fault that she left to begin with, and I've considered myself a piece of shit ever since. Things probably have turned out for the better for her, so I need to work on forgiving myself for the choices I made just out of college. Lots of kids don't grow up fast enough, but hopefully most don't have to pay as big a price for it as I did. Its an easy mistake to make, and I think I've let it get to me long enough.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Cooking up a storm

A shit storm...

How not to treat people.

I love this article. Especially the burn about how the 'Editor' and author of the pissy letter condescendingly rebuking the blogger on her writing skills misspells "offense."

Even better that this publication is now the focus of an all-out internet vitriol. Just because something is legal, doesn't mean you won't pay for it somehow.

Who really won / lost the political battle of 2010?

This is a pretty smart article on the post-election fallout.

What happened in 2010 was a party took a stand on a major issue, knowing that it could cost them their jobs. For many - it did. But the lasting effects will be worth it. Biden knew it was a "big fucking deal." It was.

30 days of truth (Day 2)

Day 02 → Something you love about yourself:

I took a second to really think about this one... its not a easy as it might sound. You don't want to give a shallow answer, because those are fleeting and cop outs to begin with. 'I like my eyes' or 'I like my hair' are bullshit answers and deep down I think we know it. Its just easier to come with those rather than actually dig for something.

I like that I don't let social norms and castes define what I like, what I wear, and where I go. Because I like X, I don't feel that I can't like Y, just because they don't seem to go together. Maybe its growing up in a small high school where you can be a jock, speech freak, geek, etc. all at the same time. Who knows. Regardless of the reason, I like that I can listen to indie rock (Bright Eyes), techno-pop (Owl City), and dubstep (a N.A.S.A. remix) in the same sitting. I like that I can wear tight jeans and a v-neck one night and a shirt and (loose) tie the next. Granted - I have my own tastes, and those tastes tend to exclude certain things (most contemporary country music for example...) but that's not my point here. Most of my friends are the same way, and I'm sure that's one of the reasons that we ARE friends, but I do see people that only dress a certain way, or only listen to a certain type of music, and if they get outside of that, its some awful secret or shame.

Maybe that's a better way of putting it. I have no issues trying new things - but namely - I love the fact that I have no shame in admitting the things I like. I have zero issues admitting that I like electronica music, I love video games, and occasionally wear fake glasses.

Monday, November 8, 2010

30 days of truth (Day 1)

Hmm, I wish this list would have started out on a positive note rather than this but....

Day 01 → Something you hate about yourself:

I hate my Laissez-faire approach to relationships. There's no excuse to be made, even though my natural response is to try and explain it away rather than deal with it (something else I hate about myself). I'm working on it, I swear, but I still need a lot of work. I make like I'm extremely extroverted, but in reality I'm a homebody and a little introverted, so adding that to being depressed/not the biggest fan of myself for the past few years and it only adds fuel to the problem. Still - I'm an intelligent person and verbalizing the issue is the first step to recovery.

30 days of truth

Got this blog idea from Roscommon, and I think its a good way to get back into regular blogging and at the same time have a little personal therapy.

Its called 30 days of truth - essentially you post on a given topic as honestly as possible once a day for 30 days. Here's the list:

Day 01 → Something you hate about yourself.
Day 02 → Something you love about yourself.
Day 03 → Something you have to forgive yourself for.
Day 04 → Something you have to forgive someone for.
Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life.
Day 06 → Something you hope you never have to do.
Day 07 → Someone who has made your life worth living for.
Day 08 → Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.
Day 09 → Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.
Day 10 → Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.
Day 11 → Something people seem to compliment you the most on.
Day 12 → Something you never get compliments on.
Day 13 → A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)
Day 14 → A hero that has let you down. (letter)
Day 15 → Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.
Day 16 → Someone or something you definitely could live without.
Day 17 → A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.
Day 18 → Your views on gay marriage.
Day 19 → What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?
Day 20 → Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 21 → (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?
Day 22 → Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.
Day 23 → Something you wish you had done in your life.
Day 24 → Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)
Day 25 → The reason you believe you’re still alive today.
Day 26 → Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?
Day 27 → What’s the best thing going for you right now?
Day 28 → What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?
Day 29 → Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.
Day 30 → A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself

Monday, November 1, 2010

Brands Simplified

A cool exercise in branding power. See how many you can recognize!

re-blogged from DataPointed.

Make-up list

I know I've sucked at blogging lately.... sigh. Sometimes I just get bummed about blogging because I feel like its always the same things going on, and never any improvements - and its not fun to document that permanently on the internets, ha.

Anyways, a bulleted list of recent happenings:
  • Tour was fun, albeit exhausting. There was a hell of a lot of driving and sleeping in a cramped van during those first few days. The weekday shows were pretty sparsely attended, like any weekday show for an out-of-town band. But they were still fun and good experience. Yes - in case you haven't already heard my story - I dropped my phone down a drainage grate in Nashville and eventually went in after it by crawling 55-60ft through a drainage culvert 8ft underground. That was the first day of the tour. The weekend shows were a blast with GREAT bands to play with. Friday's show was at a coffee shop that had no issues with bands getting crazy loud. The other bands were super nice and we all talked gear and custom made guitars. CDs and stickers were exchanged and I fought the urge to get my picture taken with one of the frontmen who looked EXACTLY like Jack White. Saturday's show was at one of the coolest venues I've ever seen with a band that just got off the road with Local Natives and supposed to be the local band that's blowing up. They were also really good to us and the people at the show gave us a LOT of love during our set and after we were done, too. We got a lot of compliments. Then we got in the van and drove 18 straight hours back home.
  • I finally finished some friends' artwork for their birthdays (which were in August...) I wasn't happy with the first few attempts and didn't feel right given them pieces that I wasn't happy with. I'll try and get my artwork blog updated with pictures soon.
  • I made monkey bread from a recipe that mom used to use. It was my first experience with making any type of bread from scratch and I have to admit - it turned out really well. Thanks to homebase for the pre-game tips. That yeast LOVED the secret sugar ingredient! Chemical reactions are crazy.